FN
p-imp:

bigpenisomg:

my best friend’s current crisis of this years holy week

i can’t

p-imp:

bigpenisomg:

my best friend’s current crisis of this years holy week

i can’t

April 17, 164 notes  — source, via
Anonymous

How do dick pics make u feel?

ladyironlungs:

the-inspired-lesbian:

This is the fucking funniest thing I have ever seen omfg.

April 17, 45,310 notes  — source, via

scott-pilgrimage:

whosromeo:

i think it’s cute when someone admits they have a crush on you

i think it’s a fucking miracle 

April 17, 429,153 notes  — source, via
"And again he shows, that Spain would do something right, in bringing him to the World Cup. For such a young guy, the talent in him is outstanding." — My commentator about Marc Bartra. (via abitlikelove)
April 17, 145 notes  —  via

-defloration:

daughteress:

actionables:

when I was 5 my aunt explained to me what the word bisexual meant and up until the 7th grade I thought that bi girls were the girls who liked both gay and straight men

is there a name for that sexuality cause that is exactly me

straight

April 16, 3,190 notes  — source, via

hvngers:

I’m addicted to sleep and not sleeping
do you see my dilemma

April 16, 51,149 notes  — source, via

turkey-imported-from-maine:

firelorcl:

meladoodle:

i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed

a dentist

i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police

April 16, 225,825 notes  — source, via

bile9:

pussylipgloss:

cartelgathering:

imsoshive:

What?

NO

YES

YAS show off fa JESUS

April 15, 15,881 notes  — source, via

hotteronline:

before taking a selfie with someone

image

April 15, 290 notes  — source, via
April 15, 205,197 notes  — source, via
April 15, 2,113 notes  — source, via

tokachiku:

hardcoreandmetalbitch:

One of the best scenes of Malcolm in the Middle ever.

that fucking kid took one for the team

April 15, 429,389 notes  — source, via
"

1. Who you are now is not who you will be in 10 years. It is okay to be somebody new 10 minutes from now. We are always learning. We are always growing. If you realized 10 seconds ago that you don’t like who you are, shed your skin, retry, replant yourself in good soil.

2. Cleaning is instant therapy. When your brain is muddy, take a shower, wash your hands, change your clothes. Spend 15 minutes straightening your living room. When you are angry, scrub things. I know it’s crazy but it works instantly.

3. Forgive someone’s debt if it’s under 50 dollars, forgive the small things, give a little time to yourself and forgive the big things too. Forgiveness isn’t about the other person, it’s about you. That being said - if someone ever hurts you in a way that would make me cry to know, you get out of there, my love. You just get up and go.

4. Gum karma is real and if you spit out a piece in public expect to find some on your shoe in the future. Same goes for insults and harsh judgement, too.

5. Do what you love and the money will follow.

6. Live your life with an open palm and give as much as you can and as often. At some point in your life, someone will lend you 50 bucks when you’re down on your luck. Remember how that feels. Remember to give that back.

7. Always wear clean underwear. You’ll thank me later.

8. There is a difference between being kind and being passive and there are those who cannot see that difference. They will try to walk all over you. Never bend your knees for those who do.

9. Have faith. Have faith in god or people or yourself or science or in luck or in all of the above. Faith is what keeps us going, faith is what keeps us strong.

10. Pay your bills on time whenever you can, although money is nothing. Remind yourself that.

11. Do not forget you were once ignorant of all you know now. Be patient of anyone who hasn’t had the education you have. Speak at the level of the person you are with - it’s not playing dumb, it’s being considerate. There’s no reason to make them feel uncomfortable. Plus then when someone starts going off about their superior IQ, you can cut them to pieces and watch their face when you do.

12. You are the best person in the room for one particular thing, and that’s confidence. You are the worst person in the room for another thing, and that’s humility. Use both carefully.

13. Never make fun of someone’s beliefs or superstitions, let your kid keep their imaginary friend and let your best buddy believe in knocking on wood. We all have security blankets. Don’t take away someone else’s.

14. Try to learn something new every day.

15. The worse you look, the more likely you are to run into someone you know so instead of feeling awkward, learn to be confident in sweats while talking to your friends.

16. Never go to bed angry, it will ruin your sleep and make tomorrow even harder. Find a way to relax. Don’t let today get to your head.

17. Think before you speak. When someone says something, mull over their words before answering. This is called listening, it is different than hearing.

18. What keeps love beautiful is that there’s risk involved. If he breaks your heart and it doesn’t hurt, it wasn’t love in the first place.

19. Never let someone else determine who you are or how happy. You are too strong to be torn apart.

20. I love you, even when we are fighting, even when I am fast asleep. Don’t doubt it for an instant. You are my everything.

" — Life lessons my mother has taught me from the side of her hospital bed (part 2/2 of a series) /// r.i.d  (via oprosti)
April 15, 56,022 notes  — source, via
April 15, 217,734 notes  — source, via

notice-me-senpie:

eren-jaegersbasement:

if you think that you are starting to get a crush on someone

  • dont
  • what are you thinking
  • abort mission
  • digest those butterflies
  • IM SERIOUS

digest those butterflies 

April 15, 121,426 notes  — source, via